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Andrew Luck Reportedly Has a ‘Top 5 Beard on Planet Earth’

By Luke Schultheis

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Not only is the Indianapolis Colts Andrew Luck a Top 5 quarterback in the NFL, but he’s also Top 5 in another important category. According to his All-Pro punter in Pat McAfee, Luck has had the type of facial hair that would make both longtime lumberjacks and the members of ZZ Top alike blush (via Luck’s NFL Top 100 video):

"“Well, he has a Top 5 beard on planet Earth,” said McAfee regarding Luck’s neck beard. “That’s a known fact.”"

May 24, 2015; Indianapolis, IN, USA; Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck prior to the 2015 Indianapolis 500 at Indianapolis Motor Speedway. Mandatory Credit: Andrew Weber-USA TODAY Sports

However, he’s not alone in his assessment, as other NFL players re-echoed a similar sentiment of the uniqueness of Luck’s grizzled neck beard:

"“I mean I’m with it man (chuckles),” said Philadelphia Eagles pass rusher Connor Barwin. “Whatever he wants to do, that’s cool.”“It was unusual too because it’s kind of like lower (gestures toward his neck),” said Miami Dolphins wideout Jarvis Landry while laughing. “And he kind of made sure he covered most of his face with that one. I mean hey, he’s in Indianapolis, it’s cold and if he can get away with it, then cool.”“He was covering up his neck, keeping it warm,” said Pittsburgh Steelers wideout Antonio Brown. “I mean it’s his beard.”“Beefy or nicely groomed, it’s looking one of the two,” said Patriots safety Patrick Chung. “So get that right man.”"

Luck’s facial hair combines a beard with his neck to form perhaps the world’s greatest neard. We at Horseshoe Heroes like to think that his Grizzly Adams-esque beard is his way of directly sticking it to the New England Patriots and their stadium sponsor in Gillette.

"“Who needs shaving? You’re supporting the wrong team, boys,” says Luck heartily laughing in our dreams, between strokes of his seemingly magical beard."

Despite our potentially misguided beliefs, Luck has previously provided a very logical explanation for not shaving his beard during the NFL’s regular season per Men’s Journal:

"“I don’t shave it during the season ’cause I hate the razor burn that you get from putting a chin strap on,” said Luck."

Sure thing, Andrew. Whatever you say.

Just like “there must have been some magic in that old silk hat” they found of a certain snowman named Frosty, we know the true enchantment of your beard says otherwise.

Jan 4, 2015; Indianapolis, IN, USA; CBS Sports sideline reporter Tracy Wolfson (right) interviews Indianapolis Colts quarterback Andrew Luck (12) after the 2014 AFC Wild Card playoff football game against the Cincinnati Bengals at Lucas Oil Stadium. Mandatory Credit: Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

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